As I've previously stated, the holidays start early where I
live. Despite being surrounded by festive Christmas decorations mere days after
Halloween, I was having a little trouble getting into the Christmas Spirit this
year. The usual holiday decorations and songs weren't as enchanting to me as
they can be. I thought giving money to a Salvation Army bell ringer standing
sentinel at a store entrance might help. It wasn't just spare change either,
but enough to buy someone a good lunch. I know that no matter how hard off I am
there is always someone more in need.
The problem with giving so much at one store was that I began
to feel as if I was being judge by other bell ringers at other stores. I almost
felt like I needed to stop and explain I’d already given. Okay, I can admit it
was all in my head, but soon I found myself feeling a little resentful. These
bell ringers didn't know me. Can’t a man
run in and grab a gallon of milk without feeling guilty for not dropping change
in every red donation bucket he passes? I have since moved past this
self-imposed distress and looked for other ways to fill the holiday void.
There are lots of other ways to give and spread cheer during
the holidays. Volunteering time or donating to Toys for Tots are always good
gestures and I do what I can with juggling between three jobs. Even with giving
what I can, my small donations began to feel pitiful, and my lack of Christmas
Spirit increased.
My holiday miracle occurred at a chance meeting with Santa
Clause at SeaWorld. It wasn't Santa that
did it for me or even the giant Christmas tree in the middle of their arctic
exhibit. It was the simple wish of one small boy. Santa was talking to him about
his favorite things to do at Christmas time. When it came time for the boy to
tell Santa what he wanted for Christmas, he responded with the unrehearsed and
genuine answer. “I want everyone who was hurt by Hurricane Sandy to be able to
have a good Christmas too. Some of them don’t even have houses anymore.”
How does Santa respond to that? How do I, a mere witness, respond
to that? I’m worried that the guy ringing the bell outside my grocery story is
judging me for not dropping some change in his bucket each time I pass while
there are others who have real problems. I’m the guy who feels guilty that I
have the only house on the street without Christmas lights. I was numb to the
spirit of the season that everyone else appeared to have until one little boy and
his simple statement melted my heart. Then it hits me and I realize —Christmas
is a feeling you can’t force.
So what’s a guy to do when he isn’t feeling in the holiday
mood around Christmas? Nothing. You can’t force yourself to get into the spirit
of the season, and the more you run around trying to feel it the more evasive
it seems to become. It’s like falling in love; you can’t force it. It just has
to happen. So, if you’re like me and need a little help to get in the spirit, I
suggest you don’t look in the usual places. It’s good to do what you can, but
more important to simply keep your eyes and your heart open. What you’re
looking for will probably come at the most unlikely time from the most unlikely
source. You simply have to believe
you’ll find it and be wise enough to recognize it when you do.
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